What the Offspring Witnessed from Behind the GameBoy | theremustbeawayout's Blog
Earlier in the week I told H. that our mutual participation in getting the offspring out the door in the a.m. was what I had always thought parenting with him would be like, the two of us working together. H. liked the sentiment. "We finally made it." Jerk. Where was he for the first decade or so?
So tonight at dinner (scene: a restaurant) he asks if he can go back to the gym this coming week in the mornings. Offspring has finished eating, we've all been talking during the meal, now Offspring is chilling with the game.
H: So can I start going to the gym in the morning again?
Me: Pause. How do I respond so I don't give or deny permission, thereby playing into the Con Job?
Me: It's been nice with you in the mornings. (I hesitated to say this, because I put myself out there. Again.)
H: You are getting up now
Me: I'm in a shoe now, so I can walk Offspring to the bus. You could leave when we do.
H: That only gives me (not enough time) to get to work (by desired time).
Me: (Punched in the gut by putting myself out there only to be knocked down) (turning away in sadness)
H: I've only ever been able to get to the gym 3x a week at best.
Me: (Honestly, there's no possible response to this that doesn't play into The Con.) (I say nothing)
H: Rubs my back and says, "Hey, there are plenty of new episodes of [insert T.V. program names]. Oh, the check is here. We can go now.
Every now and then Offspring asks why I am sad. Sometimes the sigh is marriage related, sometimes not. Next time he asks, I shall tell him enough to let him know that H does not want to spend time co-parenting. Well, even that statement is not appropriate. But Offspring should know that the marriage is not making me happy. I don't want Offspring to know that the way his parents are is what he should look forward to. I have already had to coach Offspring in greeting H with over-the-top delight to make him enjoy coming home and being with him.
Reading this last sentence, I am disgusted.
Previous PostsAn Excellent Choice!, posted May 20th, 2013, 2 comments
A Day of Pure Joy, posted May 19th, 2013
New Series: Why I can't leave the house today., posted May 17th, 2013
Ach! My Poor Japanese Maple!!!--lots of whining., posted May 14th, 2013
Looking for crowd-sourced suggestions and perspective. . ., posted May 6th, 2013
New Series: The Saboteur, posted April 27th, 2013, 3 comments
Yeah, right., posted April 25th, 2013
So this is all there is, then?, posted April 24th, 2013, 4 comments
Better After?, posted April 13th, 2013, 2 comments
H's M.O., posted April 7th, 2013, 1 comment
The Kitchen Counters, posted April 6th, 2013
THIS is why I married h; THIS is why I stay., posted April 2nd, 2013
What the Offspring Witnessed from Behind the GameBoy, posted January 20th, 2013, 2 comments
The Con Job: Mutual Participation, posted January 16th, 2013
The Con Job and How Nothing is Good Enough For Me, posted January 5th, 2013
The Con Job and Caving In, posted January 5th, 2013
The Con Job and Not Taking The Bait, posted January 3rd, 2013, 1 comment
The Con Job and My Responsibility, posted January 3rd, 2013, 1 comment
The Con Job and Being My H's Mother, posted January 3rd, 2013
The Con Job and Keeping It To One's Self, posted December 21st, 2012
The Con Job and Moral Support, posted December 20th, 2012
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The Con Job and The Priority Trap, posted December 19th, 2012
The Con Job and My Unwitting Approval, posted December 17th, 2012
The Con Job and the Freudian Slip, posted December 10th, 2012
The Con Job and How to Make Me Put Up with His Late Hours, posted December 5th, 2012
The Con Job and the Person Who Hates Con Jobs, posted December 4th, 2012
The Con Job and How to Make Me Content That He Will Be Late, posted December 4th, 2012
The Con Job and and How to Avoid Being Together, posted December 4th, 2012
The Con Job and the Request for Confirmation of Love, posted December 4th, 2012
The Con Job, posted December 4th, 2012
Asperger's, Rules, and Literalism: Part II, posted September 21st, 2012
Asperger's and the predator, posted September 21st, 2012
Asperger's and the myth surrounding routine, posted September 20th, 2012
Asperger's and literalism, posted September 19th, 2012
Asperger's and the obsessive interest and denial, posted September 19th, 2012
Asperger's and food, posted September 18th, 2012
Asperger's, 9/11, and emotional regulation, posted September 18th, 2012
Asperger's and the death wish, posted September 13th, 2012
Asperger's and the wireless collar, posted September 13th, 2012
Women with Asperger's and Role Playing, posted September 11th, 2012
The Woman with Asperger's Marries the Man with ADD, posted September 11th, 2012
Autism and Gender Roles, posted June 16th, 2012
Shockingly isolated no matter what I do, posted June 10th, 2012
My mom died on Sunday..., posted January 11th, 2012
I want to die...., posted September 27th, 2011
Love is not enough., posted September 11th, 2011
Comedy: a crisp view into truth, posted September 5th, 2011
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